An Appeal to the Purple States

Dear America (but specifially VA, PA, CO, FL, OH, NC, NM, IN, and NV),

I'd like to encourage you to take the Republican vice presidential candidate's vacuous statements and simpleminded beliefs into account when you vote on Tuesday. In the first place, she has advocated the teaching of Creationism in public schools alongside the scientific theory of evolution. I would actually condone this, as long as our science teachers are also required to instruct students on The Dreamtime; how the Egyptian god Re called forth all living things from the endless ocean of Nun; how Eros caused Gaia to fall in love with Uranus, and the accounts of all their children and grandchildren; how Odin the All-Father shaped our world from the body of the frost giant Ymir; and perhaps most importantly, how the Flying Spaghetti Monster created our entire universe while drunk. For there is just as much evidence for all of these creation myths, and many others, as there is for Sarah Palin's legendary fable detailed in two different conflicting stories in the Genesis chapter of the Christian bible. Either we advocate teaching them all in the science curriculum, or we just stick to teaching Evolutionary Theory, which is the only story that has an immeasurable amount of scientific evidence to back it up. Creationists like to argue that Evolution is "only" a theory, but they forget that the scientific definition of the word is very different from its everyday usage. The idea that germs cause disease is also "only" a theory; in fact, gravity is "only" a theory as well.

Still unconvinced that this candidate is daft? In her first big policy speech on Friday, she mocked fruit fly research while advocating more money for parents of special needs children. Drosophila melanogaster, or common fruit flies, are a model organism in biological and genetic research, essential for the study of genetics and developmental biology. This is the equivalent of saying, "Instead of funding research into airbags, seatbelts, and crumple zones in the interest of improving car safety standards, we're just going to give cash to people who have to take care of loved ones maimed in car accidents." This candidate is DANGEROUSLY scientifically illiterate. Please view the clip below for details.



"This is the most mindless, ignorant, uninformed comment that we have seen from Governor Palin so far, and there has been a lot of competition for that prize."
-- Richard Wolffe, Newsweek senior White House correspondent